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A big part of dating is knowing where to look and what for. 99% of single people don't do either of those right. As OP said (paraphrasing on mobile)

> soulmates are hype

Another commenter said:

> marry up emotionally

Emotional hygeine is imo the biggest contributor to a stable relationship. I'm a stupid curmudgeonly weirdo but my wife is a gem of a woman and she keeps me going. Her positivity and our healthy debate about literally everything makes sure everything is going well and we're happy.

Hidden gems are around and I feel that literature/media over romanticizes serendipity among other things in dating and relationships.

Dating apps are terrible. There's a HN post doing BOTE math about dating that will blow your mind. Make friends. Friends and siblings (not parents or uncles/aunts) make the best matchmakers if you are open when you want to date someone.



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