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Not trying to sound mean with this suggestion, and I know it’s easier said than done, but have you considered telling him?

It will be awkward, but walking around smelling is going to hurt him in all areas of his life.



It takes a bit of something-something in terms of communications, which I probably lack. I once asked a person (nicely, I thought) with BO, loud chewing, and unfettered burping to reconsider and he started screaming at me instead. Be careful, is all I can say.


This is what the human resources department is for.

If a few people mention it, they will have to do something. And you don't have to risk getting yelled at.


I wish I had done that but getting HR involved seemed like the nuclear option to me, especially for something the person may not have known about. I had approached the team manager but he, in spite of frequent rants about the evils of political correctness, didn't wish to act since he thought it was due to what he called 'culture'. Unpleasant business all around.

I loved the technology and product at that workplace but such awkward situations ensured that I moved on as quickly as I got the opportunity to do so.


HR doesn't punish him, they talk to him about it and why its a problem.


I worked at a big corporation. It was against the rules to comment on body odor of a coworker because of an incident where the team got together to give someone perfume and soap and such and try to nicely tell her she smelled. Turned out she had a medical condition and it was not a hygiene issue and she was incredibly upset. HR sided with her.


Yep, exactly.

We had a guy at a previous job of mine (food service) who (almost certainly) didn't wear deodorant and it became an HR issue.

His roommate (who also worked with us) said he did shower.


Showered every day?

Unless the person in question had a medical condition... I find this very hard to believe. There are a lot of cultures where people don't use deodorant but wash every day (and more if doing sports etc... And it's not an issue).


Morning, evening or both?


Got one such colleague, and she farts all day too... I can live with it but some are getting mad :-)


Well, to be honest with you, I don't really know how to tell him. Perhaps it would be easier if we came from the same culture, but we don't and I don't want to sound patronizing or anything.


>Well, to be honest with you, I don't really know how to tell him.

To both you and abawany: maybe just send a polite, anonymous email (make a one time use gmail or something)? Like a personal version of the public service whistleblower, this is the sort of situation that seems like a good fit. A simple "Hey, I see you fairly regularly and..." type of thing, that they're a nice person and you're worried they might not notice this and don't want them to be embarrassed.

I do agree that a (perceived) lack of personal hygiene can hamper people in subtle ways socially and in turn professionally, and it's possible that they could never realize why. If they're a decent enough person that's a real shame, and a quick equivalent of "Your fly is unzipped" could be a real benefit long term.


This is a great idea and I like this anonymous approach. Thanks!


No, this is a terrible idea. I'm a social idiot and even I know this is lobbing a grenade!


IMO this is one of the worst suggestions.

Imagine you get an email from anonymous person at your workplace. This is about as awkward for workplace culture as it gets. Knowing that there is some guy a) who thinks that you stink, and b) who is not man enough to actually talk to you and instead sends an anonymous message, and c) you have to continue to work with that person, d) but you don't know who it is. Any of your coworkers could be that socially challenged person afraid to talk openly and taking such a ridiculous route.

Either you find the guts to and talk about it openly or you let it slide. I'd much prefer you take the first route. I consider this part of being an adult. It's only awkward if you make it so in the first place.


> b) who is not man enough to actually talk to you

Not man enough, seriously? So are women exempt from this sort of direct confrontation?

There are plenty of good reasons to not talk about it "openly", one of the most important being that it takes skill to do it well.


> Not man enough, seriously? So are women exempt

Wow, you are seriously crazy. May I point out that your perception first of all is the result of your own brain? It is you yourself who has those ideas in their head - i did not write any of it, you found it in yourself.

As for part two of your fantastic rant, I refer back to what I wrote. You merely restate what was already said and what I responded to. Repetition does not make the argument any better.


Please don't make HN worse by responding to a bad comment with a worse one, and please don't break the site guidelines by crossing into incivility like this—let alone personal attack, which we ban users for.

If you'd read the following, and take the spirit of this site to heart when commenting here, we'd appreciate it:

https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html

https://news.ycombinator.com/newswelcome.html


I will always call idiots idiots. I don't care about this site's policies in any case, since the random downvoting (and I really mean the RANDOM downvoting, not the few times when it's obviously bad comments) is far, FAR too prevalent - AND on top of that, when some time ago with another account I upvoted a few such comments that were donwvoted for no valid reason at all you called me a "troll" for "upvoting controversial comments". That is when I lost all respect for you and your site. That's what learning that the admin is a dumb piece of shit (dumb because... that was just DUMB) does.


Ok, since you clearly don't want to use HN as intended, we've banned the account. Please don't create accounts to break the site rules with.

https://news.ycombinator.com/newsguidelines.html


Read Crucial Conversations maybe. I'm sure that would help both of you.




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